At home in nearby Irwin Township, Venango County, Robin Moore Joyce wrote a book of how her life went from chaos to peace after she received messages from God.

She understands that some may think otherwise when she talks about hearing from God.

However, she explained in detail what she means in an easy-to-read, self-published book called "My Sheep Will Know My Voice: Hearing and Discerning God's Voice." The book, released in December, was printed by Beacon Litho in Grove City.

The first part of the title is based on biblical words of Jesus; the second describes how Mrs. Joyce learned to listen to God as a new Christian.

"I don't have a special gift," said Mrs. Joyce, a 22-year Barkeyville area native who retired last year after 17 years as a reading specialist with Midwestern Intermediate Unit IV, Grove City. God wishes to speak to everyone, especially those willing to pursue his plan for their lives, she noted.

That wasn't always the case in her life, however.

After Mrs. Joyce turned 18, she left her childhood church with no intention of returning. Her early religious education did not focus on God's love as much as his punishment, she said.

"I had myself convinced at one time there wasn't a God," she said.

Part of her problem, she admits, was her.

"It's only when I went through a divorce that I thought something was wrong," Mrs. Joyce explained.

Counting dating and marriage, she was with her first husband for 16 years. "I wasn't (emotionally) whole," she said. "I put all my hopes in him."

After Mrs. Joyce turned 35, he left her. She mostly blames herself because of her dependency. "It was too much on him," she said.

After divorce, Mrs. Joyce said, "I was so desperate to be happy, I did things almost dangerous to my health, that I wouldn't normally do, and I started experiencing panic attacks."

She ran the gamut of psychiatry, psychology and group therapy. She lost weight and became fatigued but couldn't sleep. She was suffering from depression.

After Mrs. Joyce turned 40, she decided to learn how to ride a motorcycle.

Her instructor was Bob Joyce, a Christian she would eventually marry who had also experienced a difficult divorce. He was patient in listening to her concerns about God.

After some months, Mrs. Joyce experienced an epiphany of sorts. "It was over a pair of lost socks," she said, laughing.

Mrs. Joyce had misplaced her skiing socks. Joyce, who was visiting her, challenged her to pray about it. She did, after he left.

When he got home, the light on his answering machine was blinking. An excited Mrs. Joyce had left a message about finding her socks in a place she had previously searched.

"He prayed the whole way home that God would answer that simple prayer," she said.

For someone not spiritually minded, it opened a door to her heart for God to enter, she said.

She and Joyce married about nine months after the sock prayer. The two still ride motorcycles together, and belong to the Christian Motorcyclists Association. After 35 years as an elementary teacher in Shenango schools in Lawrence County, he will retire this year so they can minister full-time.

Her first year as a Christian wasn't so gleeful, though. "I didn't think I was going to make it at times," she said. "One minute I was happy, the next I was crying."

Bob Joyce spent that year "on his knees praying," she said. "He had to resist responding to me (negatively). That's what got me through that year; God's love loving me through him. I got more stable as the year went on.

"My mind became so clear," she said. "I could focus on hearing from God."

She said it's not much different from having regular thoughts. The key difference is going from having no wisdom to complete understanding of issues important to one's life.

And there's nothing disturbing about it. "(He's) so gentle," Mrs. Joyce said about God.

She realizes it's a tough thing to accept. "Even my husband thought it was weird at first, like something taking over your body," Mrs. Joyce said. But it's not like in the movies, she said.

After receiving wisdom about things like God's love for her, meatier issues in the Bible came to life. "A lot of the messages, I can now apply to teaching," Mrs. Joyce said.

She and her husband have been the main teachers for the last year and half at the Church of God of Prophecy, a tiny church in Nectarine, Venango County, which is seeking a new pastor. They've attended about five years.

Mrs. Joyce never envisioned writing a book. But, she said, "If I was this confused about God speaking, then a lot of others may be also. ... (At first), I wanted to know what it sounded like."

She didn't want to write the book, she said, because people knew of her past. Now, that doesn't matter.

"I'm excited about helping people hear God's voice," she said. "It shouldn't be so vague and iffy. ... when you ... see God for real, it's exciting."

Mrs. Joyce's book can be purchased at Gospel Book and Music Center, Grove City, and Hermitage Bible and Gift, East State Street. She will have her first book signing at 7 p.m. Jan. 28 at Church of God in Barkeyville, preceded by a dinner at 6 p.m. There is a donation of $10 to purchase the book.

To have Mrs. Joyce as a guest speaker, call (814) 786-9358.